Are You Your Own Worst Enemy?

I know I am.  Sometimes I can’t even see it. Subconsciously I realized I was beating

myself up.  Most of us are harder on ourselves than we are towards anyone else. We have

compassion for others but not ourselves.  Sound familiar? I want to explore this with you

from a Christian point of view.

Can you accept positive criticism of your accomplishments? Are you proud of yourself

for anything, you’ve done? I realized I couldn’t accept people saying good things about me.

I couldn’t see them. I don’t feel proud of myself. I never feel proud of myself. Do you feel

the same way? It is good to be proud of yourself sometimes. Here’s why… let me care to

explain. It is not pride to be proud of yourself. I realized keeping this type of mentality is

harmful. Why? If you can never accept compliments or pat yourself on the back, you’re

putting yourself down. It’s okay to tell yourself or accept that you’ve done a good job. If

you don’t, you’ll automatically fall into negative thoughts and low self-esteem.

            This leads to depression and your self-destruction.  You can’t lift yourself out of

your depression when you’re constantly putting yourself down and making yourself last. 

You will self-sabotage yourself.  It’s a vicious cycle.  What I’m trying to say, “We start feeling

as though we are not good enough.”  We start telling ourselves that we aren’t good

enough.  You try harder and harder to do better but you feel like you’re getting nowhere. 

You feel as those you are exactly at the same place, you have been, stuck.  Paralyzed and

unable to move forward.  You’ll become tired and feel like giving up.  No strength or energy

to continue.  Exhausted from the constant fight.  Fighting yourself is a losing battle.  You

and I become our own worst enemy.  In sense, keeping ourselves from growing, learning,

laughing, and getting better.  Depression creates confusion. 

            When you begin to tell yourself that you can’t do anything right or what I’ve done

is not good enough.  When we let negativity take over, we have more negative thoughts.

I’m not strong enough because I’m weak.  I hate myself.  Who could love me?  Do you get

the picture?  This way of thinking will only continue to devalue yourself. 

            Sometimes we need a new perspective.  Who do you think you are?  You are God’s

child. God says, “You are good enough.  You are worthy.  I have chosen you.  You are loved.  I

have died for you.”  You need to stop passing judgment on yourself.  God doesn’t want you

passing judgment on others around you and especially not on yourself.  Why?  We are all

His people and He is our God.  Like He says, “Be still and know I am God.  I can handle it.  I

make it possible.  I am the only one who can pass judgment.  I am the Alpha and the

Omega.  The one who is and was and is to come.”  Psalms 46:10 and Revelation 1:8.

            Let me put it a different way.  Passing judgment on yourself is like saying, “I am

God.  I can put judgment myself and others.  I’m in control.”  In a way, it’s kind of like

putting yourself on a pedestal.  Not by praising yourself but by self-focus of yourself in

which you begin idolizing yourself.  Your focus is all on yourself when it should be on God. 

You get stuck in your world of self-pity.  Trapped within your mind.  I don’t want to sound

mean but sometimes we need to be told as it is.  Being told can help us see ourselves and

kick off the self-focus.  It’s not all about us.  It’s about God.

            I needed a shift of focus.  I’m not saying that self-focus is always bad.  It can help

you create healthy boundaries that we all need.  When we are negative, we create the

wrong types of boundaries where we tend to self-isolate ourselves.  We push out not only

the bad but all the good as well.  We shut down and stop letting others in and become

lonely which fuels our depression.  You have to become uncomfortable and vulnerable at

times to grow and push yourself out of your norm. Staying where we are comfortable does

not help us grow.  It only helps us to stay the same.  When we push ourselves forward, we

learn and grow past the experience.

            I was my own worst enemy.  My focus needed to change.  I was stuck in my mind

and constantly beating myself up and feeling down.  I was knocking myself out life a

boxing match.  This made me so weak I couldn’t even concentrate or see any way out. 

Making myself physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted.  This led to spiritual

exhaustion as well.  God says, “My yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

Beating yourself up makes your burdens extremely heavy to carry because you are casting

judgment on yourself.

            God is the only one who is fair and just.  He should be the only one judging.  He

knows each of us intimately.  He knows your heart.  God created it with His bare hands.  So,

give the judging over to the Lord since He is the creator of our universe.  Stop playing with

yourself as though you are God.  Give Him all the control.  It will be one less burden you

have to carry and will lighten your load.  Your shoulders and your mind will thank you. 

            Here’s the biggest thing…  you need to remember you’re not perfect.  No one is.  We

all make mistakes.  Some more than others.  Jesus was the only perfect human being

because He is holy and righteous.  Without Him, we are unrighteous.  Jesus died to save us

from our sins, weaknesses, emotions and feelings, and all our inequities.  He took them to

the cross and shed His blood to save your life.  Our sins went to the cross and the grave. 

He has overcome them.  God did this so that you could be forgiven of your sins and

overcome death.  Your debt sin was paid in full.   He knew we couldn’t change on our own

so Jesus became the change for us.

            You need to forgive yourself.  Forgive yourself as you forgive others.  Why?  When

you hold unto unforgiveness of yourself, you are holding onto judgment of yourself.  You

cannot find any happiness this way. 

            God is greater in you than the one who is in this world. (1 James 4:4) He is greater

than the darkness, your emotions, and feelings.  Jesus surely faced them all while He was

here on Earth.  People treated Jesus as a servant, an outcast.  Look how He cried out to God

the Father in the garden of Gethsemane or on the cross.  He said, “Father, if you are willing,

please take this cup from me.  Yet, not my will but yours be done.” Second, “My God, my God, why have you

forsaken me?” (Luke 22:42 and Mark 15:34). Jesus felt sorrow, abandonment, and all the

emotions and feelings, we have today.  He knows and understands us.  The only one who

knew Jesus intimately was His Father in Heaven.  This is why He cried out to the Father and


            Why do you think Jesus prayed to God daily?  He knew His Father loved Him as He

loves us.  He loves you.  God wants an intimate relationship with you.  Prayer is key.  It is

the greatest weapon.  Yes, God loves you and knows you.  That is why it says, “Do not fear

for I have called you by name.  You are redeemed.  You are mine.”  Isaiah 43:1

            If only we would say, “God, I am yours.  You are my God.  I accept your Son Jesus as

my Savior who suffered, died, and was buried.  He rose from the dead and ascended into

Heaven.  Thank you for sending your Son to forgive my sins.”  Agreeing with God to do

things His way.  It is easier when we walk with God instead of continuing to go through the

battle as though we are alone.  In Him, your strength will be renewed.  You just have to

have Faith.  This is where hope comes from because God always has a plan, without fail.

Hope comes from the Almighty.

            So… you’re not perfect.  Welcome to planet Earth and humanity.  Not one of us

hasn’t made a mistake.  Have some compassion for yourself.  You give compassion to others

now share it with yourself.  This is the time to learn from your past mistakes and to

continue onward.  Being in this place too long is not good for you.  God loves you so much. 

He doesn’t want you to stay where you are.  He says, “Take hold of my right hand.  Let me

teach and show you.  I want to equip you with eyes to see my kingdom.  To open up your

horizon.”  The Lord loves to give us a new perspective, knowledge, and wisdom.  God wants

to increase your faith, trust, and belief in Him.  He wants to help your unbelief.  To help you

release that doubt you are holding onto.  Help you in letting go and giving it to Him.  God

wants to remove all your fears because His perfect love casts out all fears. (1 John 4:18).  

Pray and ask for these things to be given to you.   God loves it when we are humble and

ask for His help.  When we ask for knowledge and wisdom, He will surely give it.

            God plan is to revive us.  For the kingdom of Heaven is near.  If we could just repent

and turn from our sinful nature. Turn from our ways and follow Him.  Ask for the

forgiveness of the sins we committed.  God is faithful to forgive us.  How great is the

Father’s love for us? He extends mercy and grace to all who ask for it from the heart.  Ask

and believe, you will receive.  His love is so great that Jesus laid down His life for us as we

are, sinners.  He is our righteous.  God let His Son die for us, to save us.  Can you imagine

letting someone you love die for a friend? I can’t. 

            The weight of this world is very heavy.  God doesn’t want us to carry that weight. 

We weren’t designed to be able to.  This is why we are meant to come to Him for help and

asking others. Please remember, you are only responsible for yourself, and your own

choices.  No one else.  You can only change your attitude.  You are not responsible for the

poor choices of others or their problems.  Help yourself first, otherwise, you will only bleed

on others.  Hurting them with your pain.  God will help you if you only ask Him to.  He will

be your biggest encourager. Ask Him to help you stop being your own enemy, He will.

            Once you have decided to follow Jesus, I would recommend you get baptized.  Jesus

was baptized.  It was part of God’s commandment and pleasing to God.  Once baptized, the

Holy Spirit came upon Jesus.  We receive the Holy Spirit after baptism.  The Holy Spirit is

the Spirit of the living God.  He will dwell inside of you and teach you.  He is a direct link to

God.  He will shepherd as Jesus did.  He will help you and intercede for you. Baptism is a

way of saying, “God, I accept you.  I will follow your ways and commands.”  Acknowledging

the fact that God is higher, as are His ways.  It’s a covenant with the Lord, this is why we do

communion.  Believing Christ Jesus came to Earth for us as man, suffered, died, and was

buried.  Then, rose up to Heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father.  Communion

shows we honor what Jesus did and remember that He will come again. In a way, it says, “I

am your child.  I submit to you.  You can have my heart.  Here I am Lord.  I give myself to

you.  I admit I’m a sinner.  Forgive me.  I am broken.  I’m a mess.  I need you.  I come as I am. 

Here I am, to humbly serve you. I believe in your Son, Jesus and what He did for me.”  Give

God all you have to give, yourself.  Then continue in a relationship with Him by obeying

and keeping His commands.   Doing what is right and good.  This will honor Him. 

Don’t forget to give Him thanks and praise, a form of worship.

            God knows we are not perfect.  That we will stumble and fall.   He wants us to

humble ourselves and admit we need Him.  That is why He sent His Son.  He wanted to

show us and teach us.  To make a way for us to Heaven.  Jesus is the living sacrifice.  Jesus

is the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6).  Jesus made it possible for us.  Let me ask you

a question, who are you going to let carry your sins?  Are you going to continue to carry

them and be heavy laden? Or, are you going to let Jesus carry them?  It’s a choice you need

to make.  When you continue to carry them, they will only make you stumble, fall, and be

filled with shame. Regret and quilt that overcome you.  When you let Jesus carry them, you

will be released from your bondage and chains.  Free from eternal death.

            I would like to go back to pride.  Being proud is different than being prideful.  Pride

is boasting in oneself.  It’s saying, “I am perfect the way I am.  I don’t need to change.”  The

Lord hates the pride and arrogance of those who won’t accept Him and repent.  God

doesn’t change.  He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow (Hebrew 13:8).  It is us that

needs to be changed, our hearts.  Our hearts are hardened.  The Holy Spirit can help you

with this.  God came to heal the sick.  The ones who know they are sinners into repentance

(Mark 2:17).  To mend the brokenhearted and heal our pain.  Our hope is found in God


Someday when you look back from the other side, you’ll be able to see it isn’t about

us.  It’s all about God and His grace.  His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9),  He

gave us His only Son in our place to bare us from God’s wrath and judgement of our sins

(John 3:16). So, we could have life and live it abundantly (John 10:10).  You will have your

own rescue story of how God saved you, I do.  He continues to rescue me over and over

again.  For the righteous may fall but with God’s help, they get back up again (Proverbs


            God is my strength.  He fills my cup each day with what I need (Daily Bread).  In His

loving arms, I find my peace, rest, and comfort.  He gives me self-control.  All my help

comes from the Lord (Psalm 121:2).  This is how I have overcome depression by stepping

into the Light, God’s Light.  He calls each of us out of the darkness into the Light.  Do you

accept it?

            I want to touch a little on compassion.  Have compassion for yourself as you do

others.  As Jesus did for others.  You’re doing the best you can with what you have and

know.  Stop being so hard on yourself.  Stop being your enemy.  Start encouraging yourself

and believing in yourself.  Believe that you have the power and control to do this with

God’s help.  Be confident in the Lord.  Love yourself and be kind to yourself.  You deserve it

just as others do.  We all need love and compassion.  Compassion says, “I didn’t know better

before.  Now I do.”  When you know differently than you can act differently.  Love says, “I

died for you so that you may have life.” These three remain; faith, hope, and love.  But the

greatest of these is love (1 Corinthians 13:13).  For without love, we are nothing (1

Corinthians 13:2).

            I encourage you to listen, learn, and allow yourself to grow.  Change comes from

within when you are willing to listen.  Then you will learn and be able to apply it to your

own life.  This is how growth happens.  We have to be willing to learn.  There is always a

lesson to be learned if you are willing to listen.  We all have to be taught.  Next, be patient

with yourself.  You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.  God knows where you are.  He

knows you.  He will help you.  God will continue to perfect you till your end of the days,

when He calls you home. He promises to do so.  He who began a good work in you is

faithful to continue (Philippians 1:6).  Rest upon God’s promises and you will find all the

hope you need to keep going.  When you have God, you have all you will ever need.  Come

closer to God and He will come closer to you (James 4:8). 

            My last encouragement to you is to pray out to the Lord.  Sing songs to the Lord. 

Sing when you are walking through the valley of darkness.  Worship brings us closer to

God.  He doesn’t promise it will be easy but He does promise to always be with us.  Praise

and worship is our way of saying, “Lord I don’t understand but I do trust in you.  I know

your ways are good.  They are the best.”  Praise Him because He is perfect in all His ways. 

Prayer is our greatest weapon against the evil one and the darkness of this World.  Pray

without ceasing (1 Thessalonian’s 5:17).  Let God’s hope and joy be a safeguard for your

heart.  Then you will be filled with peace and understanding that surpasses this world even

in the chaos.  Remain in His Word, the Bible, to increase your spiritually maturity.   Dwell in

the refuge and shield of the Almighty.  Dwell in the house of the Lord.  You will find your

greatest happiness and desires in Him. Everything that matters is right in front of us.  We

just need to open our eyes to see.  Love is the greatest gift.  Try loving yourself as Jesus

loves you. Love yourself as you love others, right where you’re at. The imperfect Christian

who needs Christ. Don’t miss out on love. So, remember to pause and enjoy life before it’s

gone.  Give God all the thanks and praise for what you do have.  Every good thing comes

from God (James 1:17).  He has so many blessings that He wants to bestow on you.  So

many He has already given you that you will miss someday.  Be full of gratitude and live

life intentionally.  May God bless you.

Published by Brenda Tschetter

I love to write inspirational and spiritual pieces that are full of encouragement and engaging. I write about real life events filled with emotion. I want to help and encourage all those who are struggling and in pain, who are suicidal, and fill them with hope. The good news. I love to cook and have a healthy cookbook available as well.

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